The good stuff comes in many shapes and forms.

By Paget Pizitz

He was alone, and he made it work 😉

Predictably, I start my column by wishing you a Happy Thanksgiving. Personally, I’m still feasting on Halloween candy and watching the scary movies I recorded on AMC to hold me over until the next All Hallows’ Eve. A personal favorite this year was The Brood, because nothing scares the pajama jeans off me more than psychiatric wards and mutant children who look like teletubbies covered in mucus. But this doesn’t sound very Thanksgiving like, so I’ll move on.

My parents separated right before Thanksgiving about 15 years ago. My dad remained in Birmingham while my mother moved to a small town in south Alabama. I spent that first Thanksgiving with my father, who thought turkey was the laughingstock of the meat family and that stuffing referred to the white fluff our Labrador used to tear out of my Care Bears and spread around the floor. Needless to say, we concocted a dinner of frozen shrimp, stewed tomatoes and the perfectly portioned sensible SnackWells. Eventually my Thanksgivings got better, and I fell into the comfortable routine that most children with divorced parents do. I redefined my own sense of normalcy and learned to split my time between two homes and two families. However, without fail, each Thanksgiving, I still think back to happier memories and inevitably find myself a little depressed, looking for a frozen cocktail shrimp and a SnackWell.

I made a deal with myself that this year will be different. I know the holidays begin a time when many single people start to feel depressed about not being in a relationship. Perhaps you are already depressed about this because you just came off wedding season and heard Corinthians 13:4 so many times you can say it backwards in your sleep.  If the holiday blues have started to weigh heavy upon you and you feel lonely or isolated, I’m going to let you in on my thought process this month: examine the meaningful relationships in your life, appreciate them and hold them close. Instead of focusing on what’s missing, think about what you have. Families and relationships come in all shapes, sizes and packages. The power of loving, positive, self-fulfilling relationships is extraordinary and can do wonders for lifting holiday blues. If you are single amidst a sea of couples, be appreciative of the other significant relationships in your life and remember those who may not be so fortunate. I won’t spend another Thanksgiving lamenting for what once was. Instead, I will look at what I have and cherish every person who brings me happiness and comfort. Whether you are single, in a relationship, divorced or something in between, I hope my new–found positivity helps you open your eyes to the goodness around you.

Paget is the owner of Connections: Matchmaking and Personal Consulting.

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